Hukum Tarikan - Penyelesaian Persepsi Masalah Rumahtangga?

Edisi Ke-tiga

Saya terpanggil untuk memberi sedikit komen tentang masalah rumahtangga yang dilalui oleh masyarakat kita seperti yang dipaparkan di akhbar, risalah dan artikel di internet. Baru-baru ini terdapat pula kes di mana perbezaan umur antara suami dan isteri juga dijadikan isu untuk berbalah. Kes penceraian Norman hakim dan Abby Abadi juga sering diperkatakan oleh pelbagai pihak. Malah, Abby yang masih cantik juga diketepikan oleh suaminya disebabkan ingin memperisterikan si dia yang lebih muda. Ada juga pendapat mengatakan, tidak kira si isteri seorang yang sempurna, cantik dan pandai mengemas rumah atau tidak, jika suami sudah bosan dengan isterinya, dia tetap akan pasang satu lagi. Umur juga kadangkala dijadikan satu sebab utk sesebuah pasangan itu bertengkar.

Pada pendapat saya, tidak kira berapa beza umur suami atau isteri itu, tolak ansur dan saling memahami itu penting. Mungkin ada pendapat mengatakan bahawa suami yg lebih muda lambat laun akan bosan dengan isteri yang lebih tua daripadanya dan seterusnya akan mengahwini perempuan yg lebih muda dan cantik. Islam telahpun menggariskan panduan utk mencari calon suami dan isteri iaitu agama menjadi aset paling penting. Jadi, tidak kira lah sama ada si suami itu lebih tua atau muda, jika dia mahu curang dan membelakangkan isteri, perkara tersebut tetap akan berlaku. Namun, jika kebetulan lelakinya muda, masyarakat akan menuding jari kepada kelemahan si isteri kerana telah memilih calon suami yang lebih muda daripadanya dan hal ini menjadi penyebab rumah tangga itu bergolak. Jika lelaki itu lebih tua pula, masyarakat akan menyalahkan isteri juga kerana tidak pandai menjaga penampilan dan makan minum si suami. Pendek kata, masalah sebegini kerap menjadi bualan masyarakat dan kita tidak dapat lari daripadanya. Isteri menjadi mangsa keadaan dalam menghadapi tohmahan semua pihak.

Samada kita menyedarinya atau tidak, kisah rumahtangga di dada akhbar juga sering digembar-gemburkan dengan isu penceraian, penderaan pasangan, masuk campur keluarga mertua dan masalah kewangan. Hampir setiap minggu, kisah ini dilaporkan untuk tatapan pembaca. Tidakkah kita sedari bahawa disebabkan kita sering melihat sudut negatif sesuatu perkara, kita akhirnya menarik tenaga negatif di sekeliling kita dan cenderung terjebak dengan gejala yang negatif juga. Contohnya, jika kita sering memikirkan seseorang, orang yang kita fikir mungkin menelefon kita pada keesokan harinya. Dan apabila kita membenci sangat2 pada seseorang, orang yang seperti itu lah yang kita akan jumpa pada hari berikutnya. Ini ialah prinsip Hukum Tarikan. Positif menarik positif, negatif menarik negatif juga.

Oleh itu, mengapa tidak kita lihat dan fokus pada kisah2 perkahwinan yang bahagia di mana ianya boleh menjadi teladan utk mereka yang baru ingin mendirikan rumahtangga. Nescaya, tenaga positif yang diambil daripada kisah-kisah tersebut dapat membimbing kita untuk menjadi modal insan yang lebih baik dan berkepimpinan.

XxPuteri Salju..xx

Saya Pun Suka Awak :)

Saya suka awak. Saya nak awak hadir selalu di samping saya - Cornetto Love.

I wish he could give me a strawberry cornetto...
like the lovers i watched on the TV.
I wish we could sit on the bench near the lake...
like the loving couples i read in a love story.
I wish we could grow old together and be in each other 's arms.
I wish i could hold you close and never let go.
I wish i could wait for you...
like a princess waiting for the hero.
I wish i could.
I love you.

Goodbye 2010

Don't compare yourself with others.
Look at the qualities inside you - those that others dream to have.
~Home-town best friend.

~A Tribute To My Girl friends~

It's the New Year Eve.
I didn't celebrate the joy of bunga api like the other teenagers on the streets at my hometown do. Heck, in fact i am not a teenager no more, i cant believe that it's difficult to swallow the truth that your age would increase year by year. It doesn't matter how young or old you look, but you'll grow old at the end somehow. Like the wise men say, beauty fades away slowly without we noticing it. Yeah, i eventually agree with it. That's when i started to flashback the memory in childhood, high school and college years. I miss my friends. I miss all my girl-friends. I miss the glory of achieving good grades in academics, chasing after boys, gaining popularity in cheerleaders, playing prank calls to the most-hated person, having coffee in the campfire etc. And yeah, girls..we won the theater competition in our History class while in form 2! ;)

Prom-night Queens

Cheer- leaders!

As much as we miss the moments, time and tide waits for no one.
One by one of our buddies falls in love and gets married.
At least, it is not the puppy love we ever talked and laughed at during high school.
But i am sorry to hear that some relationships are not working well.
I am sorry to know that some ends a single mother at a very young age.
But remember - the baby you cuddle in your arms can call me "Mommy" too! :)
The kids we have or gonna have would have a different sets of Moms to love and protect them.

Be positive.
Don't raise the white flag yet.

Love, Cry and Vain

Readers,
I'm back after a very long silence. Sorry for not giving much attention to this blog for i was pretty much occupied with work and study. Guess what, i successfully passed my VIVA (oral defense for Master degree) at USM yesterday and this means another convo celebration coming next year in March 2011. Thank you to Dr Agnes Liau for her kind guidance and supervision; you are the best mentor and mother :)
Here are some updates for the past few months:

September :
- I was so stress and completely worn out after the hari raya break. I started gathering all my strength to finish my last three chapters of my dissertation to be submitted to my supervisor. The process of writing up the thesis was tough; i sacrifice a lot of time, money and energy to produce a great piece of work. The many drafts * A4 papers handed equals to 100 trees.LOL.
- Students are busy with midterm tests. I used my invigilation time in class to revise theories and significant topics related to my thesis. I stayed late till 11pm at office to finish marking the test papers.

October
-I couldn't remember anything important in October except having class parties with my engineering students. It was fun !! I recorded myself playing piano - 'Love Story" and 'Still Water' for them. I received overwhelming support from my students ;)

November
- Mom's birthday on the 5th; so we had a small gathering with the family at A& Z Restaurant. It was my treat, we had Ikan Bakar, Tomyam, Kailan ikan masin, kerang bakar, kuewtiaw kungfu and sup ekor. Yummy... :)
-Back to campus and having some trouble with collegues regarding the exam analysis but we managed to handle things at last.
-Another stressful month for me for i have to mark 100++ exam scripts and get my thesis done to be submitted on the 25th Nov. I quarantine myself in the room, so i could focus more!
-It was Dad's birthday on the 26th, we didn't really get together for a celebration since Mom got warded to the hospital. I decided to buy Dad a gift he would never forget - I bought him a mobile phone for his birthday which worths RM900+++. I could see the joy in his eyes, but too bad i couldn't afford him a Blackberry.
- I managed to play Pachabel's Canon in ID smoothly! ;)

December
It's a month full of weddings!!!
4th dec - Nani's
18th dec- my cousin's
25th dec- Puteri's
The many-way-backs from Penang to KK are energy and time-consuming. Oh no.. i couldn't watch Teater Natrah for it clashes with my friend's wedding. A lot of plans need to be cancelled to respect other people's needs.
Well, it is still the middle of December and there's nothing much to say except attending people's weddings and kenduri. Really hate it when ppl keep questioning me when is my own wedding day.. as if they're gonna support my expenses of the ceremony ke?

Will be driving back to KK tomorrow; i took a whole week leave. Wishing to get a gud response from parents regarding the situation i told them. It's not really a gud month to argue with your parents, so, i cross my fingers waiting for their decision.

The past four months are painted with love, cry and vain. Thank you Allah for i am still breathing.

xxPeace!xx.

Thank you, dear!

No news from Mr X and his girl.

Life is getting back to normal once again, except the pain and headache i have to bear for completing my thesis.

And my thought completely goes to you during these tense and difficult times.

For all the support & encouragement, for all the kindness and comfort words.

Thank you, dear!

I love you.

*Hugs and kisses.

Get Lost, dummy.

Dear Mr X,
I've got a stupid message from your girl. It was really annoying. I am not that type who steals away someone else's fiancee, you fool!
Can't you see that I am already occupied with all sorts of stuffs/commitments, rather than messing up my mind with you?
I dont need you, dummy.
I repeat -
Dont bother to keep in touch.
I am seriously not interested.

Goodbye.

The Most Tasteless Film

ALthough there have been a great comments and criticism upon the film 'Lagenda Budak Setan' - LBS adapted from the novel Ahadiat Akasyah (my friend's most hated author), i nver jumped into a conclusion until i myself watch it to evaluate the issues the author presented. NOw, despite the wonderful comments from others, i hereby say that this is the most tasteless film i ever watched! Here are some of the reasons:

1. The story and the plot is illogical. I can understand stories like Harry Potter and LOTR are claimed to be illogical too, but these films fall under fiction and fantasy, while LBS is not. BEsides, the setting takes place in a university; the university students portrayed in the movie represent second class mentality in which it is okay to make fun of the professors/lecturers and it is acceptable to intimidating other students at the university cafe.

2. Lecturers are academicians in which their job is to teach and deliver ideas during the lesson. A rational professor won't be affected emotionally by a small love letter left between the pages of the textbook. In LBS,the lecturer cancels the class immediately due to the prank joke applied by Kasyah and friends.

3.The theme of love is centralized as the main issue. Love at first sight plunging Kasyah and he cant stop thinking about Ayu, though he initially puts a lizard in the drink can (which he doesnt know belongs to Ayu) and he later on repents from any misdeeds to tackle Ayu. I view this as something ridiculous because the drastic change of Akasyah doesnt make sense to me since Ayu is a stranger. Akasyah's main motive to change is not because he honestly regrets his bad attitude toward others, it's rather the lust he feels about Ayu. Ayu in the movie is described as pretty; the question arises is, would Kasyah comes to her rescue if the girls he puts the prank on is ugly?

5. The lecturer's job to punish Kasyah by asking him 2 do hundreds of sits up is again nonsensical. We, lecturers have a lot of other jobs to care about applying corporal punishment to such students.

6. Having a "dana" to continue a big project would be impossible for a trouble maker like Kasyah. In a university rule, a student who involved with disciplinary problems (especially the serious ones) would be dismissed or be taken any privileges. Kasyah is called "Budak Setan" since he has involved in many kinds of illegal actions and been called to the disciplinary units.

7. The plastic surgery thingy was really funny! LOL. An accident like that would have made the victims died on the spot.

8. 'Hilang ingatan' and being transferred to remote places are the only ways for the author to make things complicated in Malay stories. Isn't there any other alternatives?

9. This movie lacks Islamic values. Love is the only thing that matters to both Kasyah and Ayu. Love drives people mad. Love leads to jealousy. Love takes away rationality. What about love to God and Rasul?

10. People cry due to its sentimental love story. But people are you sure it is because of the story or the music soundtrack? I think the music soundtrack really plays a vital role to affect audience's emotion, not the story itself.

Malay authors and Malay movies should consider the moral parts and the Islamic values injected in the films to make sure what is presented can influence teenagers' way of thinking to behave in an Islamic way. LBS is only a fantasy of a school girl to have a nice boyfriend like Kasyah who will love her till the end of time. Well, girl.. trust me.. it won't happen that easy in real life.LOL.