Thursday, February 10, 2011

Brainy vs Attitude

You know you're getting old(er) when your friends are getting married and start having kids. ~Old-town friend, 2010.


Is marriage the bond of two minds?

10 years ago, my ideal boyfriend would be someone who is:
1 - Handsome (..with a cute smile to die for!)
2- Impressive personality
3- Intelligent and smart
4- Rich but money comes the last!

To tell you the truth...10 years ago, I believed in the love of Romeo and Juliet, when you fall in love with a handsome guy who is able to sacrifice anything for you. Materials are out of the questions coz I believed in true love in which it could happen in a second and it haunts you forever once you are hooked to that someone. Love is sweet, love is what makes the world go round.

Conclusion: Good looks on the top of the list, followed by the guy's personality, intelligence and money income.

What happens after 5 years?
...I started deciding that my ideal soulmate would be someone who is:
1) Intelligent enough to impress me and my gilrfriends
2) Charismatic personality
3) Handsome
4) Not so rich since money comes with an effort

Yes, 5 years ago, intelligence becomes my priority.I realized a smart and brainy man would hold a potential future of a better living. Attitude is important too but looks matter less. Money is essential but someone who is striving for money by his own is better than the wealth inherited from the family. Being wise and intelligent helps you to get more money in the future.

Conclusion: Intelligence comes on the top, followed by charismatic personality, good looks and economical stability.

What happens after 3 years to now?
...now.., i started selecting that my ideal future husband would be someone who is:
1) Wise in personality with strong religious view
2) Strong financial background but not necessarily rich
3) Smart but not necessarily intelligent
4) Handsome but not necessarily cute

Conclusion: Personality ranks the top, followed by money, intelligence and good looks.

Now, i realized life is not a fairy tale. Attitude and money go along together. You can never survive your life and parents' expectation without them.An intelligent man is none without a strong good personality, wise judgement and strong religious view. Looks do not matter anymore while wealth does. They give you power to regain influence in your family. You can't live with love alone. In order to nurture the love, you need money to sustain the relationship.

Weird.
People's perception changes.
I am confused of what ppl really want in a marriage.
But our Malay society shapes me.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

miss bile lak?
kami nak ase jgak nasi minyak nie~~

SnoW whiTe said...

Insyallah if ade orang yg sesuai. Doakan lah ye :)

Old dwarf said...

ini yg rs mcm nk argue byk2 ni...haha

1.10yrs ago-i dun think that girls care bout the personality..girls only care bout themselves..i mean they only care for their own good..so,the list should be a)handsome b)rich c)intel d)personality

2.5yrs ago-which mean we are already 18 or 20 y.o above..at that time,we start thinking bout future..the life is getting more serious..girls will not just think bout themselves..so,i agree with your list there..haha..

3.3yrs till now-hmmm..at that time,girls will begin to take more seriously in rlationship..i was happy when reading your list..but when i read your last sentence ' In order to nurture the love, you need money to sustain the relationship'..according to what i understnd there..without money,u cant have a good rlationship..its like money to buy a rlationship..bad idea there..

thats it for my opinion..hope u dun get mad..hehe..and i wish u will get the type of guy that u like..

SnoW whiTe said...

Dear Old Dwarf,
you are mad at my list,huh?
ha3.

well..this list applies to me not to all girls. well, money is too important to care less for. Even if girls dont care abt it too much previously, the parents will do. THat is why i stated that money can buy a relationship. But to be in a relationship provided with love and wealth, this promises a better living (Not i say it, but this according to our orang2 tua)...this is what our parents aim for their daughters.

So, you can blame our old wise men/society for proposing that syarat.huhu.

p/s Girls might care about themselves, but it's better than guys who do not knw how to take care of themselves at all.LOL.

Old dwarf said...

dear snow white...
im not mad or angry at your list...beside,im just comment about it..ha3

so,i just made a new list from what i've experienced...but i still feel that money is a bad idea..its like whoever got money,that person can get anything with money..including buying love..

i know that nowadays money is quite important to us..but it doest need to be soo rich just to buy love..trust me,if u look to a guy's persoality first..u wont care bout hw much money he have...

i think our parents doest mean that wealth need to be rich..it just need a stable job which can afford their daughter..that is why i state that personality comes 1st because when u face a problem..that is the time where u will need a person who can make u laugh in that kind of situation..money cant make u laugh..

im a guy too..i guess u are right..guys doesnt care bout themselves...but they care bout others especially family and friends..gf is not included..lol

SnoW whiTe said...

Wahh, old dwarf..
if your gf knws abt this, she surely feels hurt and going to break up with u.*just beware ;)

I guess what you said is true. When personality counts, you will forget about who the person is, whether he/she is rich or not. But if only life is like a fairytale, this would be a sweet dream for everyone but unfortunately it is not.

I talk this based on experience (since i'm older, i hav gone thru lots of things).. You cant just easily fall in love with someone because of the personality without caring less about the level of education/wealth. And if you did, u have committed a very big mistake since you're gonna hurt your family etc. This refers to woman only, not man.. ok? For a man, marriage is up to his own choices. He has to support the family and marrying a housewife/orphan is not a big deal.

Well, i think the way u're thinking is just like the way i was behaving 5years ago.Huhu. So, don't worry... your perception gradually changes one day.

If you dun believe me, wait after 5years. I'm sure you will try to trace back our discussion on this blog again :P

Old dwarf said...

ok..i will wait 5 years later...that time my age will be 26-27..haha..cant imagine wut im gonna be that time..myb i'll maintain like dis or i'll be like wut u said

Old dwarf said...

u said that u confused at the last paragraph...wut is it that make u confused?

SnoW whiTe said...

When the society especially the parents pay too much attention on materials and the person's background before letting the daughter marrying the person she loves. Not to call them materialistics but it seems its the fact.